Tag Archives: dogs

Jebediah In His Salad Garden

I painted Jebediah in the garden and then his owner told me that Jebediah likes to eat flowers so being surrounded by them would be a lot like walking through a salad garden. As a result of his appetite for foliage, he is actually not allowed anywhere near the garden. This is mainly a fantasy portrait both for his owner who wishes she could bring him into the garden and for Jebediah who most likely wishes he could eat the garden. It’s win-win and funny. At least I think it is. I am going to be giggling about this painting for weeks.

Jebediah in the Salad Garden
11×14 watercolor and India Ink. Does he look hungry?

 

Jebediah sounds like he might be a bit of a rascal. I am pretty sure it’s because he is a Beagle. He can’t help himself and he just has good taste. Some flowers are just to delicious to resist!

Jebediah In The Flower Garden
Close up of Jebediah.

 

I painted Jebediah using watercolor paint and India Ink. I think the black India ink really makes the colors pop. I started using it for the first time when I painted Trixie, Jebediah’s sister (not biologically, obviously). I like this ink because it is waterproof. I usually apply it to my painting last, but sometimes I decide to touch up a few spots with watercolor paint so having waterproof ink is really important. I don’t want any smudging! Is there anything worse than messing up a painting minutes before you are finished with it? Trust me, it has happened before! The waterproof India ink keeps me from crying. Ruining a painting a few minutes before completion makes me ball like a baby. Like a cranky baby with colic.

If you want to try it out here is the ink I use (affiliate link):

Jebediah has been sold already, but if you’d like me to paint a portrait of your dog in the garden (salad or otherwise) please contact me here for rates.

This is day 9 of my #30in30 painting challenge.

Chihuahuas Pee On Everything

Chihuahuas pee on everything. EVERYTHING! When we brought Stevie Wonder home we didn’t realize he was going to be marking his territory all over the living room, but he did. So, we got him neutered thinking that would help. It helped a little, but since he was already two years old his peeing on the inside was pretty much set in stone.

Chihuahuas Pee On Everything
Snuggling with Tiny-Small’s toy.

I google searched solutions and came up with just a few that might work. Mostly people just said, “If your Chihuahua isn’t trained by two you are screwed.” I had a feeling we were screwed. Stevie Wonder was a peeing machine. I considered buying stock in Nature’s Miracle since I was using it so much. If only he could get a job as “professional urinator” for movies and TV shows we could be financially set for life.

Chihuahua's Pee On Everything
These worked until he took a Wiki-leak.

One suggestion I stumbled upon online was to diaper the dog. I wasn’t too comfortable with this option because diapers and dogs just seemed like a weird combination, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So, I bought some doggy diapers. I became one of THOSE pet owners. The older I get the more and more I become the kind of person I never imagined I would be. I put diapers on Stevie Wonder when he was in the house and I couldn’t keep a close eye on him. Like all the hours Tiny-Small is awake and getting into trouble. The first couple of times he wore his diaper happily and never peed in it or anything. I put him outside like clockwork and I thought we had found some middle ground. It seemed like we had reached an understanding of some kind. I considered tempting fate by removing the diaper when he was inside. After all, some people claimed that their dogs were cured of peeing inside just by wearing a diaper for a few days. Sadly, a few days later, he peed all over himself and the diaper and I had to give him a bath. I tried the diaper again on another occasion, but he chewed it off and then Tiny-Small ran around the house trying to put it back on him.

Chihuahua's Pee On Everything
Crate UP, Stevie Wonder.

Another option was crate training. I tried that next. It’s a very slow process because the dog is supposed to like being in the crate. So, I started giving Stevie Wonder treats in his crate and putting him in the crate for short periods of time. After a few weeks of this, he tolerates the crate, but I don’t think he’s ever going to love it. He never goes in on his own. I’m not sure he ever will. After spending a month or two in animal control lock-down I can’t blame him for not enjoying time in a cage.

Through all of this I have been praising him for peeing outside and giving him treats for peeing outside. I’ve followed him around the house as much as possible trying to keep him from peeing on the furniture. It’s helped, but I think I am the one getting trained. Stevie Wonder is just going about his daily business while I chase him around and observe his every move. We have not reached pee-free status.

A few times we have grumbled and maybe even quietly sworn a bit. I mean even Tiny-Small has gotten in on the complaining. The other day I heard her exclaim, “Damn it, Stevie Wonder, you peed again!” So, I guess we might be swearing and complaining a little more loudly than we realized.

Chihuahua's Pee On Everything
Saved by adorableness.

All I can say is it’s a good thing he is so funny and so adorable because otherwise we’d probably think about regifting him to some unsuspecting friend or relative (just kidding friends and family…maybe). He is a really cute dog. He plays and runs super, really, duper fast. He can jump very high and he is an excellent watch dog. Nothing gets past his super-sonic hearing. He’s also fearless and will bite your ankle if he doesn’t think you belong around here. Plus, he’s snuggly and likes laps. We’re keeping him, pee and all.

I haven’t given up hope. I may still succeed in potty training him one day. It seems impossible, but miracles do happen. Anyway, if you are thinking about getting a Chihuahua you have been warned: Chihuahuas pee on everything.

 

Child’s Career Aspirations Thwarted By Anal Glands

Child’s Career Aspirations Thwarted By Anal Glands – I know it sounds like a headline from The Onion, but this is a true story. Tiny-Small has wanted to be a “dog doctor-princess-ballerina” when she grows up for a while now. She has two doctor’s kits and most of her favorite toys are covered in bandages. They are a sorry-looking lot! We recently visited Jim at work and the first thing Tiny-Small noticed was an exam table in his office. She was so impressed. She kept talking about how sick people would sit on the table or lie down and get shots. She loves to talk about shots. She does not love to get them. Jim found it all amusing since he doesn’t actually use the exam table. He shares office space with a doctor sometimes. Tiny-Small was not all that impressed with Jim’s computer or office with a window in it. She just wanted to get her hands on the looking-in-your-ears-contraption mounted to the wall.

Child's Career Aspirations Thwarted by Anal Glands
No photos please…I need to nap with this sock.

Anyway, Stevie Wonder had to go to the veterinarian to get a booster shot and I thought it might be the perfect time to take Tiny-Small. She could see a real “dog doctor” in action. Plus, she could see that the veterinarian, sadly, does not wear a princess dress or practice ballet while doctoring the animals. I know she’s young for that kind of disappointing reality check, but sometimes parents have to do the dirty work, right?

Well, we waited in the lobby like good dog owners. Stevie Wonder tried to show a Rottweiler who was boss. The lady with a cat chatted with Tiny-Small. Jim held the door open for everyone carrying a sick pet. I read People Magazine. (Don’t judge. It’s the only time I read it, I swear! I only recognized two people) Tiny-Small introduced herself to everyone using her full name, including both of her middle names, introduced me using my entire name and then introduced her dad as just “Jim” which must mean something, but I don’t know what. In short, she was charming the entire waiting room. The ladies were laughing, the men were smiling, Tiny-Small was on stage cracking jokes and practicing her ballet moves.

Before long, we found ourselves crowded into the exam room with Stevie Wonder, where we discovered he did not need a booster shot, there was some kind of computer typo, but he did have impacted anal glands. If you don’t know what anal glands are, just count yourself lucky…or do an Internet search, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. If you do know what they are, well, you know what is coming next, probably.

Child's Career Aspirations Thwarted By Anal Glands

The veterinarian put on some rubber gloves, the tech secured Stevie Wonder, and then the Veterinarian started squeezing Stevie’s butt. Tiny-Small was staring in rapt attention. Stevie Wonder was not happy. Then the veterinarian sprayed Stevie Wonder with what can only be described as “dog butt freshener” so he smelled like a powder fresh mongrel with a side of dog breath all the way home. I know because he sat on my lap for the entire ride.

On the way home, Tiny-Small kept saying, “Dog doctors have to touch dog butts? That’s disgusting!” She just couldn’t believe it. Jim explained that the doctor wore gloves, but Tiny-Small wasn’t having it. “He stuck his finger in Stevie’s butt, Dad, that’s gross!” She squealed with delight. She’s at that age where discussions about butts and poop are her absolute favorite. She even makes Jim sing songs about Stevie Wonder pooping on the floor before she goes to bed every night. It’s not classy, but when it comes to bedtime we will do almost anything to ensure she goes to sleep, stays asleep, and does not catch us eating all of the ice cream and watching Downton Abbey.

I wasn’t sure if witnessing the anal gland squeezing would change her mind about wanting to be a dog doctor at first. I mean, she thought it was gross, but she said so with so much glee that I figured it could go either way. Unfortunately, my fears were confirmed this morning when she announced, “I think I want to be a people doctor instead.” I didn’t have the heart to tell her that people doctors sometimes have to touch butts too.

And that’s how my child’s career aspirations were thwarted by anal glands!